(no subject)

[wordslinging]

Currently Untitled Bandom Vampire AU, 1/?
Fandom: *mutters* Bandom RPS, but heavily, heavily AU.
Rating: PG13 so far, for language, implied violence and sort of vaguely implied if you squint sexuality.
Summary: Step 1: Watch the music video for "A Little Less Sixteen Candles..." Step 2: Listen to "Vampires Will Never Hurt You". Step 3: Mix liberally.
Warnings: It is 100% Pete Wentz and Gerard Way's fault that I'm writing this. That's my story and I'm sticking to it. If the fact that it's bandom vampire AU hasn't already sent you running, I don't think there are any more warnings I need to give.


One of the first things anyone new to the Chicago scene learns is that Gabe Saporta's place is neutral territory. Dandy or Punk or Thug, vampire or hunter or the silly human kids who've read too much Anne Rice and think this shit is cool, everyone's safe inside the Cobra--that is, safe as long as they don't get on Gabe's bad side.

Gabe's official reason for this is that it's just good business. He doesn't play favorites. He's everyone's friend and no one's enemy, and while the balancing act gets a bit tricky at times, he wouldn't trade it for any other line of work.

Of course, get him talking candidly--and throw in a few tequila shots--and ask him about the neutrality policy and he'll lean forward, flash that stupid grin of his, and admit the less-official reason.

"Dude, have you ever seen a vamp and a hunter in close quarters when they know they can't lay a hand on each other? Best show in town, man."

Newcomers to the scene tend to be skeptical, but the policy works. It helps that the sprinkler system is rigged with holy water, which keeps the toothier clientele in line better than a bouncer ever could, and the bouncers themselves are tough enough that the humans prefer not to mess with them. If all else fails, there's the basement, which Gabe has only ever had to use a few times. Mostly he just threatens people with it and lets rumor do its work.

---

If Gabe did play favorites, William likes to think that he would have an edge. Of course, William is always surprised--and usually intrigued--when anyone manages to resist him. Still, he and Gabe have shared some...interesting times, and Gabe's refusal to bend the neutrality rule in spite of this has been the cause of more than a little pouting on William's part.

Which is not to say he doesn't still show up at the bar at least briefly most nights. Anyone who's anyone in this town--and most people who aren't anyone, for that matter--goes to the Cobra, so the Dandies make it a point to maintain a presence there.

As do the Punks, and the Thugs. William stays on only the most barely civil terms with the leader of the Punks, but he's actually rather fond of Travis, who is one of the other ones who might have an edge if Gabe wasn't so stubbornly neutral. William's been kicking around the afterlife since before either of them were born, but Travis is considerably younger, and he knew Gabe when he was still human.

And then, of course, there are the children. Half the fun of going to the Cobra, for William, is the humans. He's never broken the rules, and never intends to, though he may, on occasion, have picked out a few appetizing kids to follow when they leave (a risk that any human who sets foot in the Cobra willingly takes, unless they're too foolish to think ahead that far). No, the best part about the humans at the Cobra is that they're fun to watch. Children playing dress-up, so many of them, and at times, as he plays his own endless games, William almost envies them their innocence.

Finally, there are the hunters, who in their own way amuse William as much as the children do. Which is, if anyone asks, the main reason he hasn't killed them all yet.

---

Pete avoids the Cobra when he can--being around vamps he can't touch just pisses him off--but Patrick, Andy, and Joe go there during the day, sometimes. It's a good place for information, since Gabe has no policies whatsoever against gossip, and none against business transactions so long as he gets a cut of any profit that gets earned in the bar. Most vamps are smart enough not to talk about their plans with hunters around to overhear, but they're less cautious around the bartenders, who aren't above bribery. There's one in particular, a pretty brunette who goes by Vicky-T, who's passed the boys valuable information more than once. Joe and Andy tease Patrick about having a crush on her, but if he does, he's never acted on it.

For Patrick to have a love life, he'd have to make time for something other than hunting, music, and constantly trying to improve Pete's formula.

Once upon a time, they would have scoffed at the idea that life as a gang of vampire hunters could be routine. But as weeks and then months pass after their first blundering attempt (in which Joe got bitten in the arm, two vamps got away, and Andy had to stab the one they did get four times before he got its heart), there's no doubt that a routine is what they're settling into.

Daytime: Pete sleeps, and the rest of them stay in bed pretty late, too. Andy's usually the first up, getting in a half-hour to an hour of sword practice by the time Joe and Patrick stumble out of bed for lunch. Afternoons are for any errands that need to be run (including maybe a visit to the Cobra), Patrick's continued experiments with the formula (he's still trying to find a way to make it both effective and palatable), and more weapons practice. Pete's always on them about how they have to be good enough to take on beings with superhuman strength and speed, but even without his nagging, they'd remember it.

Nighttime: The first thing Pete does when he wakes up is make a batch of formula and drink it. The second thing he does, at Patrick's insistence, is record his thoughts on the latest mixture--how it tastes, how well it satisfies the bloodlust, how it compares to previous mixtures. The third thing he does is bitch about being Patrick's guinea pig, the necessity of the formula, and his general lot in life. Patrick never interrupts, when Pete gets going. He knows it's best to let him get it out of his system early in the evening.

They like to mix things up with the hunting--go out at different times, work different routes, employ different strategies. Unpredictability is an edge, and they need whatever edge they can get. Whenever it happens, it usually takes up three to four hours a night. Pete would hunt all night if the others let him, but they've learned not to let him go out without at least one other person to watch his back.

Before or after the hunting, Pete makes time for practice of his own. If nothing else, the others can't say he pushes them any harder than he pushes himself. The rest of their nights are split between jamming--the only time Pete relaxes anymore is with a guitar in his hands--and the blog.

The blog was Pete's idea. Well, sort of. It was Patrick who first suggested they should find a way to share their experiences with others.

"We got into all this with no clue what we were doing, and as a result, we've had to learn everything the hard way," he'd said. "Maybe there are kids out there who we can help, so they don't have to."

It was Pete's idea to do it in the form of a blog.

They post everything they feel safe revealing on the blog--videos, case files, combat tips. Patrick writes about the formula in general terms without ever revealing exactly what he puts in it, and they never give personal details besides their first names and the fact that they live in Chicago, which every vamp in the city already knows, thanks to gossip.

They've gotten a ton of hits and an enthusiastic response, mostly from people who think it's some sort of role play or amateur film project, or from teenagers of both genders inviting Pete to come to their houses and bite them, swearing they "won't mind as long as you don't drink too much!! :)", but there are more serious responses. A lot of those are probably still just people who get a kick out of playing along, but Pete knows there are at least a few out there who actually believe it all. Dirty, for one--the blog is how the boys found him. And if even one kid out there escapes what happened to Pete because they were forewarned, then he's done at least some good.

Pete spends more time with the blog than any of them, sifting through the comments people leave, replying to some of them. One night, there's one in particular that catches his eye. It's the kind of comment Pete likes--no asking if this is a joke, no gushing about how cool vampires are, no talking about how hot he and the other guys are. It's a simple, direct question.

hey, patrick and/or pete, does that formula stuff actually work?

The signature is just as simple--mikey w. Pete eyes the comment for a moment, then shrugs and leans forward to type back.

tastes like shit but it does the job. why? --pete

He doesn't know if Mikey W. is sitting by his computer waiting for a reply or what, but he refreshes after a minute, just in case. Nothing yet. He moves on to some of the others, and it's nearly twenty minutes before he sees a response from Mikey.

can we do private messages here? or can we take this to email?

--Now that's interesting. Commenters who are just in it to play along usually like having the whole Internet for an audience.

email addy's in the profiles section, he shoots back, and it takes a much shorter time after that for the little popup informing him of new mail to appear.

i know a guy who might be able to use something like that, Mikey's email reads. he's been stealing from blood banks so far but he's...not always the best at the stealth thing, even now. plus he, like, guilt trips over stealing from the red cross.

Pete is officially intrigued by these point. He and the guys have been doing this going on four months now, and one thing he's never seen or heard any sign of is another vampire like him, unwilling to hurt people. It's a moment before he can come up with a reply.

sounds like you care about this guy. you okay with telling me who he is?

He almost hits "Send", then backtracks to add if he doesnt hurt people i don't have a problem with him, promise. plus its not like i could find you or him just based on this anyway.

There's no response after that, for long enough that Pete figures he must have scared Mikey off. He tells himself to go a little easier if anyone like that ever gets in touch with him again, and goes to practice knife-throwing for a while.

It's not until almost dawn, when he checks his email one last time before heading to sleep, that he sees Mikey's name again, on an email sent over an hour after Pete's last question. It's only two words.

my brother.

Comments

[milkafterserial.livejournal.com]

ooooh i like this!

only i'm going to be picky and correct your only error (that i can see), and that would be word choice in the summary... "Mix liberally" might not be really correct, "liberally" the way you're trying to use it is usually used as a description of an amount, such as "a liberal amount of sugar", or something, so while "mix liberally" is technically correct, i suppose, it still sounds off, y'know what i mean?

aha, sorry if that seems overly critical or something, but it was bugging me.

really looking forward to more of this, it sounds like it's going to be really good.

[jezrana.livejournal.com]

Hm. I mean it as in "liberal amounts of mixing", which seemed right when I wrote it, but I get what you mean.

And glad you liked the story. :D